Long-Haggerty
Chartered Professional Accountant

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Good humor is one of the best articles of dress one can wear in society.
- William Makepeace Thackeray

Jokes for accountants
(see humoropedia.com/funny-accounting-jokles/ for more!

Why was the accountant so excited that he completed a jigsaw puzzle in only 59 weeks?


Because on the box it said 8-12 Years



There are just two rules for creating a successful accountancy business:


1. Don’t tell them everything you know. 

2. [Redacted]



Have you heard the joke about the interesting accountant?


No? Me neither.



If an accountant’s spouse cannot sleep, what does he/she say?


 “Dharling, could you tell me about your work.”



There are 3 types of accountants.


Those who can count and those who can’t.



How was copper wire invented?


2 accountants were arguing over a penny.



An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor. “Doctor, I just can’t get to sleep at night.” “Have you tried counting sheep?”


“That’s the problem – I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it.”



What's an extroverted accountant?


One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you instead of his own



Why did the accountant stare at his glass of orange juice for three hours?


Because on the box it said Concentrate.


When does a person decide to become an accountant?


When he realizes he doesn't have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.


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